My Compass
December 6, 2024
Writer: Violeta Neuman
Editor: Sara Tweed
Before my parents left me in my dorm room freshman year, my dad gave me a thick envelope with my name and a small compass. I put it aside at first and got caught in the whirlwind of the first weeks of college, eventually forgetting about it. But one day, in a pit of homesickness, it came to mind, and I decided to open it. Inside, I found twenty neatly typed pages, black ink bold and precise, like each had been carefully measured before finding its place. He explained it as “my compass,” guiding me towards a life well lived, sharing the values that have helped him steer his own ship. The letter is sectioned into “The Five Pillars of Life,”: Family, Health, Friendship, Work, and Culture. Life is like a house, he explains, you build it with your own hands for yourself, and the pillars keep you strong and protected.
He begins with family, saying family is everything and always first. Our family are the people we don’t choose; we love them as they are. He tells me to not take my amazing family for granted, saying the bond needs to be nurtured and cared for. The way to do this is by communicating, being reachable, and expressing, with words, how much you care. Life gets busy, and being away at school brings a challenge of distance, but don’t forget to support those who have supported you. I think about these words, and I have made it a point in my routine to reach out more. We only realize how much we need each other when it’s too late to make up for lost time.
Next, my dad delves into Health, stressing how health in the body and mind is the motor of our existence, the reason for our well-being. He says how most of us know what is good and bad for us, yet we still make bad decisions. He speaks on the importance of turning off electronics, reflecting, and prioritizing a good night's rest. He also stresses good nutrition and steering away from dangerous substances. We only have one body, and I think a lot of us forget we are not invincible. Embracing the habits that help you thrive–sleep, nutrition, and exercise is what is going to give you the energy and strength needed to live a happy life.
He then moves to Friendship, the bond between two people out of the most unselfish interest. Good friends are good listeners, they give good advice, fight for you, and are there if you call them at 4 am. We don't need a hundred friends, we just need a few. Coming to college, this resonated with me. College is full of people, but it’s easy to feel lonely. I started thinking about the friendships I was beginning. I shifted my focus to friendships that had substance, the ones where I could be myself. It was a hard lesson to learn, but one that has made all the difference in navigating my college years.
Next is Work, the subject no college student wants to discuss. My dad shares one of the best pieces of advice he ever got from a hotel manager in Panama; the most important quality in people is attitude. To be responsible, to learn, to evolve, to be on time, and to listen. He tells me to look for the attitude I am putting into college. What I show to professors and other students will allow them to value me as an individual. “It does not matter if you are studying to be a brain surgeon or plumber, how you commit to something is what will make you stand out in anything you do.”
Finally, Culture is “the ability to be able to look at ourselves from a distance,” he states. Like watching ourselves as an actor in a play and zooming out and seeing what is happening around us. Embracing curiosity about the differences in culture that surround us every day. Being cultured is understanding that we never stop learning. College is a melting pot of different backgrounds and beliefs, it gives you the opportunity to form new opinions and challenge your previous ones. Unlock a naive curiosity and start immersing yourself in the differences, it is essential for growth.
My dad ends the letter by explaining the foundation of all the pillars: Love. Love makes the world go around; it's what makes us all want to get up in the morning. Reading these words made me realize the truth behind his statement. It gives us the drive and motivation, love is essential for building your home, and without it, everything would crumble. This letter utterly changed my approach to life. Embracing my dad's unwavering belief in me and absorbing his wisdom gave me a newfound confidence that I had never experienced before. I hope these glimpses into my dad's wisdom can help you navigate your own sea. The tides through college are turbulent, but having a guide can give you the strength to move forward. So, find your compass–one that helps you chart your course, one that helps you build your own house.
Image: Lynn Sabieddine
