Messy Girl Aesthetic
January 25, 2023
Author: Hannah Tiller
Editor: Carolyn Berryman
Every time I scroll through Tiktok, I inevitably come across videos of the “clean girl aesthetic.” After a night out, the clean girl wakes up, hair perfectly tousled and blown out, face acne-free and makeup-free. She pours herself a cup of lemon water or matcha, exercises, and even meditates. This has to be fake, right?
I keep scrolling past the post. It's another clean girl giving an OOTD of her simple, effortless aesthetic outfits. A t-shirt and basic blue jeans look so effortlessly put together. That’s enough TikTok for today, I think to myself as I roll out of bed, looking like I was hit by a truck.
My mind can’t help but contemplate my inadequacy as I get ready for the day. I brush my teeth and pick at my blemished skin in the mirror before attempting to cover it up with skin tint and concealer. I stare into the dark pit that is my closet, full of eclectic clothes from the last few seasons. Sigh. We can’t all be Matilda Djerf or Hailey Bieber.
So I put on my less-than-perfect clothes and go about my day which I know is far from a “clean girl aesthetic.” Do you know what a “clean girl aesthetic” day does not look like? Taking out the trash in my apartment. Drinking Liquid IV to nurse a wicked hangover. Sleeping past my alarm. All inevitable things many people have to do. But I can’t help but compare myself to the clean girls on Tik Tok and find discontentment with my living conditions.
At times, I ponder what steps I would take to become a clean girl. I would need to purchase the newest beauty product that Bella Hadid is supposedly using, then slick my bob into a perfect bun, and finally live a life making no errors- exuding the aura of an undeniably perfect person. It’s all impossible.
The journey to reach a “clean girl aesthetic” is simply not one I see myself taking. I would have to give up so many of the messy parts of my life and personality that make me me. I like my home to be chaotic and colorful. I save my money to avoid purchasing overly trendy items that will go out of style in a month. I have a visible cowlick that grows my hair in a weird direction, acne and scars that tell life stories, and a body that probably doesn’t fit the beauty standard. To erase all of that would erase me.
I’m here declaring that I just might have a “messy girl aesthetic”: the aesthetic of living life the way you want it, with its imperfect nuances and disorganized beauty. I might not even have an aesthetic, which is okay. I’m more than a so-called “aesthetic”.
