Roommates 101
November 2, 2022
Writer: Carly Schneider
Editor: Zoe Harris
It’s that time of year. Parent’s Weekend is now a distant memory, Fall Break came and went, Thanksgiving is rapidly approaching, and sharing our personal space every day is now routine, rather than a surreal dream. Whether you are in an 11-by-18 dorm room with a random roommate, one of 50+ girls in a house together, or experiencing your first-ever room in an apartment, navigating this new combination of individual and personal spaces can be a huge adjustment, sometimes awkward, and occasionally problematic.
However, sharing a space with others can also be one of the most fun and rewarding experiences of your college years. Although pushing yourself outside of your comfort zone to this degree might initially feel daunting, experiencing these different living situations can allow for exponential personal growth. I went from having one roommate in my freshman year dorm (shoutout Ella!) to sharing a rectangular room with three other girls (shoutout Peyton, Lily, and Natalie!). I can wholeheartedly attest to the fact that both situations have taught me crucial lessons about how to treat both myself and those around me — roommates or not.
During freshman year, the biggest lesson I learned was the importance of realizing that everyone operates differently in their own personal spaces. Everyone has different levels of messiness, food habits, and sleeping patterns; understanding the balance between maintaining my personal quirks while being open to my roommate’s was pivotal in my growth experience. This year, it’s been the importance of respecting and creating alone time. It does take time, but eventually, my roommates and I had the ability to establish our own boundaries while also creating genuine friendships: the ultimate balance.
With that being said, this stability doesn’t come naturally, and being crowned a “good” roommate requires effort. At one point or another, you’ll ultimately endure the mistakes, the tears, and the general trial and error that comes with an experience like this. To guide you through this process, here’s a condensed list of tips and tricks from your U of M peers to help mitigate your worries about living situations, while ensuring that your roommate situation is as positive as possible.
“It is so great to be best friends with your roommate, but it’s also not the norm. In some situations, it can be almost better to have separate friendships.”
“Understand that everyone is on their own schedule, not only for school but also for different moods, like if your roommate’s stressed or irritable. It’s their living space too, so at the end of the day, they are just letting their emotions out in their own home. The same is relevant for you!”
“Don’t spill water on the floor and pretend that you didn’t.”
“Compromise!! Not everything can go your way, but also stand your ground when you need to.”
“Don’t be afraid to tell your roommate if something’s bothering you or else it will build up and make you even angrier down the line.”
“If you lack in some ways (messiness), make up for it in other ways (taking out the trash).”
“Talk about your pet peeves and boundaries before they become a problem!”
“Your room is your house — treat it like your entire family is living in it.”
Incorporating a few of these words of wisdom into your living situation means caring enough about yourself and your roommate to create the best, most comfortable housing possible. But, whether you succeed or fail, there’s no doubt that the growth you’ll experience from this will aptly shape you into a genuinely better person — roommate or not.
