Boy Crazy like my Mama
December 10, 2024
Writer: Addie Siembieda
Editor: Lexie Meltzer
“Why are men so goofy?” I texted my mom from the corner of a frat party during my first week of college. Earlier that day, I had gone on a bad first date. On the walk to the frat party, an ex-boyfriend of mine texted me out of nowhere. I wasn’t about to unload all of my boy drama onto my brand new friends –it was a girl’s night out, after all – so I did the only logical thing I could think of: texting my mom.
“Why are we boy crazy?” she texted back.
As cliche as it sounds, my mom is the strongest, hardest-working woman I know. She’s a lawyer who owns her own solo firm. She excelled at the University of Southern California and the University of New Mexico Law School. She competed in triathlons, trail runs, and mountain bike races. She always tells me the truth I need to hear, even when I don’t want to hear it.
She was spot on in her assessment of me as “boy crazy”. I love being in relationships. I love having a crush. I love love and anything that has to do with it. I have been the girl who restructures my little daily habits in hopes of running into a guy I like. I spent just about all of high school dating someone. I can be quick to catch feelings, slow to let go of them, and all too eager to share the news with anyone who will listen.
My mom has so much love to give. I’ve felt it firsthand in the way she raised me. Even though it felt like she was always working, she was consistently there when I needed her the most. I’ve seen the way she gives that love to others. My parents got divorced when I was two years old, so I grew up watching my mom navigate love and relationships. As I got older, romantic relationships became something we could talk about together. I trusted my mom not to judge me for getting attached to crushes and boyfriends so quickly because I knew she felt things just as deeply as I did.
“Why are we boy crazy?” Because we both have so much love we want to share with someone, and a desire to be loved in return. We both know that we are strong, successful, driven individuals on our own; I intend to follow her example and perform at the top of whatever field I enter. Wanting to be in love does not negate any of our achievements. Falling head over heels doesn’t mean that we center men in our lives or that boys are all we think about. Dating is a compliment to our lives, not necessarily a distraction.
A year ago, my mom met someone who treated her very well. It makes me so happy to see her be loved the way she deserves to be loved. I get so excited when she tells me about all the sweet things her boyfriend did or said. I’m not currently in a relationship, but I know she’ll look forward to hearing the same things from me.
Maybe we are just a couple of boy crazy overachievers. We give 100% in everything we do, whether that's work, school, family, or romance. There is nothing regressive or antifeminist about wanting to find someone to love and build a life with. The beauty of it all is that we can be both strong and soft, build our careers and a relationship, and love, and be loved.
