The Pants That Changed My Life
January 11, 2023
Writer: Zoe Sinkford
Editor: Lynn Sabieddine
I have never been the kind of girl to love shopping. Sure, it’s fun on occasion, especially if I am with my friends, but shopping and being surrounded by clothes has never been something that I gravitated towards. This used to be a point of frustration between my mom and me, specifically during back-to-school shopping. When I was younger, I had not yet comprehended the fact that I did not enjoy shopping in person. So, I would end up begging my mom to take me to the mall to buy whatever clothing item was trending at the time, only to get there and sulk while feeling uncomfortable. I would get cranky because none of the clothes ever fit perfectly, and my mom would get frustrated because I was acting cranky after begging her to take me to the mall in the first place.
However, my unease with going to the mall led me to a beautiful place — my mom’s closet. Instead of finding new pieces at Zara or Urban Outfitters, I looked at the clothes in my mom’s wardrobe. Sweaters, boots, earrings, dresses, any clothing item you can think of — I have probably worn my mother’s version of it. I have been particularly biased towards my mom’s closet since getting to college. I have multiple sweaters of hers in my closet here in Ann Arbor, but more importantly I also have a pair of her pants. When she gave me these pants, she told me that she used to wear them all the time before she became pregnant with me. She loved those pants, so I find it comfortably cyclical that I also happen to love these pants.
Her favorite pants are my favorite pants.
It is honestly kind of bizarre how well these pants fit me. They are old khaki low-rise pants. I used to be scared of how I would look in low-rise pants or jeans. My insecurities made me scared to ever even try a pair on. However, this year, as my mom and I were going through her old clothes looking for something I could take back to school, we found these pants. She was so nostalgic about them that she begged me to try them on. I was hesitant at first, but for my mom, I would do almost anything. So, I tried them on. I didn’t even look in the mirror before walking out of the bathroom to show her. The warmest smile spread across her face as she took in me wearing her old pants; then she walked me to the mirror, giddy as she showed me what I looked like. I couldn’t believe it. I had never worn a pair of pants that fit me better in my life. Immediately, we knew that I needed to bring them to school with me this year.
I have worn these pants probably twice a week every week since the year started. That’s a lot. When I think about why I love these pants so much (besides the fact that they look impossibly good on me), I am reminded of my mom and her face when I first tried them on. They used to belong to someone I love, and now they belong to me. There is something incredibly powerful about sharing with the people you love. Sharing clothing items or passing down heirlooms, even if it is just for one use, is also sharing a piece of yourself, your space, your home. I find it very hard to ignore the beauty in that.
These pants have a history with my mom. Stories of hers are woven into the threads holding these pants together. And now, they hold stories of mine, too.
Image: Chloe Sinel